when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Randomize
