omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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