Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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