Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
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I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
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You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.