Well douche your snatch and let's go!
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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