i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize