ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
she peed on how many people?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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