she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
