God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
