this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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