i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
