VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize