I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize