If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize