i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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