Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
