i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I wish I only lived at night.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize