We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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