i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
