Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.

(1-978): View more from Massachusetts

woah 15?

(978): View more from Massachusetts

i know! what is this dateline?

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(978): dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation. (1-978): woah 15? (978): i know! what is this dateline? http://tfl.nu/8i0q

Replies (12) Good night (669) Bad night (1855)
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(212): View more from New York

we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady

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(212): we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady http://tfl.nu/of3l

Replies (7) Good night (1972) Bad night (555)
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(513): View more from Ohio

I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.

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(513): I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear. http://tfl.nu/d8gq

Replies (31) Good night (863) Bad night (11232)
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(906): View more from Michigan

quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets

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(906): quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets http://tfl.nu/q9v7

Replies (11) Good night (666) Bad night (2494)
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(703): View more from Virginia

i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?

(1-703): View more from Virginia

yes

(703): View more from Virginia

... don't judge me

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(703): i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing? (1-703): yes (703): ... don't judge me http://tfl.nu/twd6

Replies (20) Good night (3911) Bad night (849)
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(434): View more from Virginia

NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.

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(434): NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup. http://tfl.nu/qouj

Replies (20) Good night (6669) Bad night (1124)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.

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(+44): Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man. http://tfl.nu/2h1j

Replies (5) Good night (3263) Bad night (950)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.

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(978): Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday. http://tfl.nu/eeh8

Replies (13) Good night (2713) Bad night (674)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar

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(978): Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar http://tfl.nu/tjlh

Replies (6) Good night (2186) Bad night (630)
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(301): View more from Maryland

But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you

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(301): But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you http://tfl.nu/si0a

Replies (4) Good night (1128) Bad night (553)
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(206): View more from Washington

Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.

(1-206): View more from Washington

Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.

(206): View more from Washington

Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.

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(206): Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack. (1-206): Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on. (206): Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together. http://tfl.nu/xcw6

Replies (11) Good night (2148) Bad night (462)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

So Monday we're lesbians.

(1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.

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(717): So Monday we're lesbians. (1-717): Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball. http://tfl.nu/1nin

Replies (6) Good night (1291) Bad night (439)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge

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(404): I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge http://tfl.nu/wfh9

Replies (1) Good night (689) Bad night (254)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.

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(202): I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself. http://tfl.nu/zw8t

Replies (3) Good night (517) Bad night (250)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.

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(860): Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible. http://tfl.nu/baf8

Replies (4) Good night (875) Bad night (325)

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