don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
