Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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