i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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