that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
