i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
