But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
