turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
