there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
