He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
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Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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