Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
