just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
