New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize