I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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