I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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