There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
