Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
