i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize