so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
All I want is dick and wine.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
