She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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