he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
