direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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