Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
