smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
