it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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