so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
