Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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