their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Plan B is the new Plan A
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
