did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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