How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
