maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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