i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
you inspire me to be a worse person
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
